Authorities said in a statement today that a high-ranking Nazgul has been arrested on criminal charges in a scheme to embezzle millions from the government of Mordor. Grundir the Implacable, the undersecretary for Evil Ring Acquisition, was escorted from his home to the Minas Morgul police station.

There are nine Nazgul, or “ring-wraiths,” who are sworn to serve the dark lord Sauron. Before becoming one of the Nazgul, Grundir the Implacable was a well-known Númenorian king and hedge fund manager. Sauron saw potential in the young Grundir when he was still a mortal human and hand-picked him to be corrupted by the power of the One Ring. At 932, Grundir is the youngest of the Nazgul, but was thought to be well-liked and trusted by the other dark riders. The alleged betrayal of the Dark Lord is particularly troubling because until now it was thought that the Nazgul had surrendered their free will to become the unquestioning thralls of Sauron.

“It’s obviously very upsetting,” said Khamûl, the Witch-King of Angmar. “There was always a sense of camaraderie among us ring-wraiths. I thought we were a team. It may take centuries to rebuild that trust.”

Grundir the Implacable’s lawyer, Malindur Cohen, insisted there was no truth to the charges. “These accusations are spurious and insulting,” Cohen said. “Grundir the Implacable is a pillar of the evil community. Having no corporeal form, he has no need for money or physical possessions. Other than his winged steed and his Mordor-issued black cloak, he owns nothing, and he has no ambition beyond furthering the baneful reign of the Dark Lord.”

Sauron was unavailable for comment, but is believed to be keeping an eye on the case.

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